Attending mediation sessions can often help people with an amicable divorce. While a lot of people make the assumption that mediation is only helpful once they have been unable to reach an agreement with their lawyers, this is not true. Mediation is a great first step for most couples, because they will be allowed to say what is most important to them, and feel heard, all while talking to a mediator who understands what is legally required as well. Therefore, when couples are contemplating divorce, they should look for a great mediator is a good first step.
One of the most important things that people should understand about mediation, is in order to attend mediation, they do not have to retain a lawyer. This can be very expensive, and is often a barrier for many people, therefore being able to have a conversation about what is most important first even before anyone hires a lawyer can make it seem very achievable. Also, the mediator is going to be able to let each party know what the next steps should be, so that people who do not know how to go about obtaining a divorce can get the legal requirements that they need to proceed.
One great thing about mediation, is that the mediator is a neutral, third-party person who will ensure that communication is respectful at all times. This is important, because often the reason why people are negotiating a divorce, is because they have stopped having an amicable relationship with their significant other. Because of that, communication can be strained and difficult. However, a mediator will have rules of conduct that can ensure everybody feels safe, treated respectfully, and avoid things like yelling, interrupting or any physical contact.
A mediator is especially beneficial if there is a power or knowledge and balance in the relationship. Often, this imbalance is part of the reason for the marital breakdown, and working with the mediator can ensure that this knowledge or power imbalance is minimized. Since the mediator will know all of the legal wear men’s, it eliminates the risk of one person guiding the proceedings in a way that they want, that is often most beneficial to them and not the other person. It also helps with a power imbalance, by ensuring everybody in the same room are treated the same, with respect, and that both people get to speak.
While most people do not get married, with the idea that they are ever going to go through a divorce, it is often necessary, especially when relationships have already fallen apart. Therefore, hiring a mediator from Miller Boileau can help ensure that communication is as smooth as possible, so that an agreement can be reached without the expense and emotional trauma of hiring lawyers to litigate in court in order to get the terms that they want.
What to Expect At the First Mediation Appointment
Mediation is a great first step for anyone who is considering a divorce. The reason why, is because no matter how well a couple is communicating at this point, mediation is a great way for both parties to feel heard and respected, while they negotiate their legal issues. The hiring a mediator first can often help people avoid the heartache of litigating in court with a lawyer, that can often end up not only being expensive, but end up with neither party getting what they truly want or need.
When people are arranging for their first mediation appointment, that they should avoid trying to chase down all of the legal paperwork that they have. Often, what people think is needed is not. And ultimately, and mediator is going to know what is legally required to bring. By both parties coming with an empty hand, can often even the playing field, and make both parties feel like the other one does not have an advantage over them. Therefore, people should not start to get their legal paperwork in order, they should allow the mediator to decide what is needed, and the mediator will also help decide who is going to be responsible for bringing what paperwork to the future meetings.
However, that people should do some different preparation prior to their first session. They need to sit down, and think about what is truly most important to them. This is not about thinking about how much money they want to get out of the proceedings, or who is going to end up with the house. But getting to the heart of what is most important, what they value and what they fear. By coming to terms with that, can help people negotiate on the topics that are most important to them, to make the entire process much clearer.
Mediation can have been even before either party has retained lawyers, and so therefore it is that comfortable, and inexpensive first step. Often, that people need to put a very large retainer down before they can speak to a lawyer, while a mediator, they get paid by the hour, but it is a much smaller commitment, and can be helpful to get people through the first few stages of their agreement. By arranging mediator first, can help ensure that by the time people are ready to hire a lawyer, best of the difficult work has already been done.
Many people are willing to go to mediation, but they have already had enough of a communication breakdown that they cannot be in the same room together. While shuttle mediation is more expensive, it is possible. And it is also less expensive than both parties simply retaining a lawyer, and litigating in court.
By understanding what is involved in mediation can help people take that first step, so that they can end up with an amicable divorce agreement, easily, and without having to fight in court. It can often be a less expensive way to get to an agreement, and it can definitely save a lot of hurt feelings, Ensuring that people can come to an agreement amicably.
Early in her legal practice, influenced by her late uncle who was a Justice of the Court of Queen’s Bench, Marla Miller, K.C. became a Family Law Mediator. She has been helping families through mediation for over 30 years. In 2001 she, along with Pierre Boileau, K.C. and others, was one of the founding members of the Association of Collaborative Professionals (Edmonton). She has been an active volunteer with that Association ever since.
One of the first Family and Divorce Lawyers in Edmonton to make a commitment to give up litigation as an option, Marla remains passionate about helping her clients settle outside of court by finding agreements that meet their needs and interests. As both a Registered Collaborative Family Lawyer and a Registered Family Mediator, Marla is one of the most experienced family Mediators in Edmonton.