Be very careful with what you post, text, or email during a divorce. Messages can easily be shared with your ex’s lawyer or a judge. Avoid venting online, posting about your relationship, or sending emotional messages. Think before you post—and consider taking a break from social media entirely.
Think Before You Post
We live in a world where every message, photo, and comment can last forever. During divorce, your digital communication matters more than ever. A single post or angry text can end up in court—or damage your case in ways you didn’t expect.
Before you post or send anything, ask yourself:
Would I be okay with a judge reading this?
If the answer is no, don’t send it.
Digital Communications Never Truly Disappear
Text messages, emails, and social media posts can easily be:
- Forwarded to your ex’s lawyer
- Presented in court
- Shared with friends, family, or even your employer
Even private messages can be screenshot or copied. Nothing online is ever truly “just between us.”
Social Media Danger Zones
Here’s what to avoid posting or sharing on platforms like Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, or X (formerly Twitter):
- Comments about your separation
- Complaints about your spouse
- Details of legal proceedings
- Photos with new partners
- Posts about spending money, going on vacations or heavy partying
It may feel like a way to blow off steam, but these posts can seriously hurt your credibility—and your case.
Assume everything you post could be seen by:
- A judge
- Your former spouse
- Future romantic partners
- Employers or coworkers
- Your children—now or in the future
Be Smart with Emails and Texts
When you’re hurt or angry, it’s tempting to hit send right away. Don’t.
Instead:
- Take a deep breath
- Write out your thoughts in a private document if needed—but don’t send them
- Focus only on essential topics, like child pick-up times or urgent legal issues
Keep your messages short, respectful, and to the point. Let your lawyer handle the legal arguments.
Consider a Digital Detox
During your divorce, it may help to take a break from social media altogether. Instead, process your emotions in safer, more private ways:
- Talk to a counselor <- counselor is American; counselor is Canadian
- Join a divorce support group
- Keep a personal journal
- Confide in close, trusted friends
This allows you space to feel, reflect, and heal—without leaving behind a digital trail that could come back to bite you.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can my ex really use my social media posts in court?
Yes. Screenshots of posts, comments, or private messages can be submitted as evidence in family court. Judges often take this information seriously.
Should I delete my social media accounts during divorce?
You don’t have to delete them, but consider staying off social media during the process. If you do post, keep things neutral and avoid any mention of your case.
Is texting my ex okay if we keep it civil?
Yes, as long as your communication stays respectful and focused on logistics. If things start getting heated, it may be better to go through your lawyer.
If you’re facing a divorce and want guidance on what to say (and not say), call Marla Miller today at 780-482-2888.
Early in her legal practice, influenced by her late uncle who was a Justice of the Court of Queen’s Bench, Marla Miller, K.C. became a Family Law Mediator. She has been helping families through mediation for over 30 years. In 2001 she, along with Pierre Boileau, K.C. and others, was one of the founding members of the Association of Collaborative Professionals (Edmonton). She has been an active volunteer with that Association ever since.
One of the first Family and Divorce Lawyers in Edmonton to make a commitment to give up litigation as an option, Marla remains passionate about helping her clients settle outside of court by finding agreements that meet their needs and interests. As both a Registered Collaborative Family Lawyer and a Registered Family Mediator, Marla is one of the most experienced family Mediators in Edmonton.